We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
