Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
