He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
