Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
