i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize