She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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