there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
