You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
