i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
