You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
