I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
