glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
