please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
