i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
