reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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