How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
