Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
