worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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