You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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