Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize