Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
