Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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