I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
