i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
