No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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