i can't believe i had my finger in that
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
