he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
