Fine. I'll sleep in my office
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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