Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
