She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
