dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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