from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
