I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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