I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
