Texts From Last Night · Crazycraig916's Favorites

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Crazycraig916's Favorites Texts:

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(479): View more from Arkansas

If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.

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(916): View more from California

You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

what does that even mean?

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.

(401): View more from Rhode Island

Jesus...So southern.

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(810): View more from Michigan

I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same

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