Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Randomize
