just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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