Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
