So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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