you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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