dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
