yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize