Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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