Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
