I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
