Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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