Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
In other news, I just burned my penis
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Randomize
