So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
