i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
