On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
